this is 911 state your emergency
YES I NEED HELP IMMEDIATELY I CAN’T FIND MY LIZARD
911 I THINK MY LIZARD IS BROKEN
YOU THINK YOU’VE GOT PROBLEMS? MY PHONE SEEMS TO HAVE LOST IT’S LEGS
911 I CAN’T GET MY PHONE OFF THE RECEIVER
MA’AM YOUR PHONE NEEDS TO BE IN THE UNLOCKED POSITION AND MAY NEED TO BE PROVIDED WITH ADDITIONAL HARDWARE TO FUNCTION CORRECTLY.
YES HELLO 911 CAN YOU HEAR ME I DROPPED MY HEADSET IN THE WATER DO YOU READ
TO BE HONEST 911, I AM NOT SURE WHAT MY PHONE IS DOING
911 MY PHONE IS FACING THE WRONG WAY AND I CAN’T GET IT TO TURN AROUND.
yes 911 hello all these people are crazy
this is still going around and it makes me rly happy.
(Source: babylizard, via luenititan)
*opens door slightly* *peeks out* Do we who?
*screams* DO WE WOOOOOOOOOOO WEEEEEEE OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WEEE OOOOOH OOOOOOOH OOOOOOOOH OOOOOOOOOH!! *turns into tardis*
I JUST TRIED DOING THIS WITH MY BOYFRIEND AND THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED:
Me: KNOCK KNOCK >u>
Him: Who’s there?
Me: Do we <u<
Him: ………………….Do we..? D:
Me: You’re not doing the joke properly! D:
Him: OH. OH. Do we WHO?
Me: *discovers you can’t adequately replicate the Doctor Who theme song while laughing*
(Source: tardisongs, via gandalfthesasssy)
I AM HUGGING YOU BECAUSE I LOVE YOU
ALSO SOMEONE ATE ONE OF YOUR SHOES BUT THIS IS NOT ABOUT THAT
(Source: vasuki, via liamdryden)
"Stay close to anything that makes you glad you are alive."
So my Dad and brother took separate cars to dinner tonight, and this happened.
they look like they are arguing about who is going to go home and change
Oh, they were.
Jake: You’ve got to be kidding me
Dad: You SAW me walk through the kitchen on my way to pick up your sister!
Jake: No seriously do you have an extra shirt in your car this is ridiculous
Oh my god they’re gonna kill me they didn’t want to even walk into the restaurant together let alone have this many people reblog this photo
(Source: laureninlilly, via onionringforaday)